Advice from women: What advice would you give to your son or brother about dating, relationships, etc?

I'm convinced that a big part of the gender wars is that women, in particular, our mothers teach men very little about the opposite sex and how to be successful with the opposite sex. Women and men train their daughters and give them perspective about dating, relationships, marriage etc. Daughters are cherished, coddled, and protected in regards to these issues. Men however are left to fend for themselves and have to resort to trial and error in this arena. For those who find success, they're able to build and maintain intimate relationships with the opposite sex and are highly sought after. For those who don't find success, they're the losers, the creepy guys, the desperate, and the lonely. Why our women failing our boys and young men in this arena? It seems that women even want superiority here as well.Advice from women: What advice would you give to your son or brother about dating, relationships, etc?
i do not know what to think about you... i was never coddled. three brothers, and they never spared me. nobody told me how to behave. had to guess.





i would tell guy's to slow down, don't commit until you're at least 30, and be sincere always. also, don't put up with any crap. move on at the first sign of deception.





btw, i would give this same advice to a girl.Advice from women: What advice would you give to your son or brother about dating, relationships, etc?
I don't know about other parents, but we talk to our boys about girls all the time. Neither one is dating yet, but we talk about choosing wisely, avoiding the trashy girls, protecting themselves (and the girls) from unwanted pregnancy, etc. We also encourage them to be friends with girls, which I think helps them be comfortable with girls. If women are failing boys in this area, I think it's more a matter of not knowing what to say, and boys feeling uncomfortable talking to their moms about girls. What do you think women should do differently? (Hopefully that didn't come across with an accusing tone, I'm really interested in what men think about this.)
I do agree to some point, but when your grown, you pretty much figure it out ya know! I have 2 sons and I talk to them all the time on how to treat girls/women and just to be respectful of them and of themselves because we all know that if you don't have respect for yourself then you sure as H*ll won't have it for others! Great ???? by the way!
Never thought of it like that...I dont think it's true.





Give my little brothers (21 and 18) advise all the time about women...have also protected them from bad women as well. I tried setting one up on a blind date...course that didn't go over well lol.





I cant really say my mother or father really talked to me about dating...except for the dont's you know dont have sex, dont kiss on the first date blab blab blab
Huh? I remember my friends telling me more love advice than my mom ever did!





I give my little cousins love advice all the time....how to treat a girl, how to take care of themselves, how to be respectful, yadda yadda.





Getting them to actually listen is another story. They're 13 years old, you think they wanna listen to me? :P
I would advise my brother to treat his dates as equals, nothing more, nothing less. But conversely, I think girls get less advice about careers and education, so there needs to be amendments on both sides.
This is an interesting questions because I have children in elementary school. Since they have sibblings of the opposite sex, they are very comfortable with boys and girls. The strange thing is that when I call moms of boys for a playdate with my girls, the mothers are often very uncomfortable with the idea. Some have gone so far as to wonder if it is ';appropriate.'; The same thing has happened when my son wanted a playdate with a girl. I'm glad that my children see the opposite sex as someone to have as a friend. In my opinion, most successful marriages are based first on friendship... I wonder how these kids who were denied friendships with boys and girls will view the opposite sex and have any success in knowing what makes the opposite sex ';tick.';
men do get advice from our mothers and sisters (some anyway), its just that the advice they give is mostly incorrect.





how many times has a mother said to her son 'treat all girls with respect and be nice to them'? now how many girls have you seen with the jerk?





if you're programmed to be this way then its gonna take alot of time and experience to learn for yourself. in the past i would have never have dreamed of insulting a girl.not even in a playful way. i didnt get any attention from girls. then when i started getting an attitude i had more girls interested....not that many but there were some lol.
Yep. - Also, women for the most part don't understand the psychology of women, and ';game'; and couldn't help if they wanted.





But it's just so much just their lack of understanding, women for the most part purposefully (not necessarily maliciously) give faulty advice that they themselves have not adhered to. They don't say - '; treat girls like guys treat me and you'll get sex and relationships'; - which would be the best advice they could truly give right? No they don't that. Instead they offer the advice to these men that they should uphold ideals and behaviors that most times the woman themselves have not had experience with, therefore they have no idea of the consequences of these behaviors. They're novel ideas, but not realistic or socially beneficial.
Before throwing in my two cents worth, can I ask why it is that men are not giving advice and support to their sons if ~ as you say ~ they are not? Do they not care to do so?





Young men will listen to men ahead of what women have to say, especially during the teen and early 20s years.





Even if their is no father figure in the home, men and boys have friends, there are organisations open to them such as sports clubs, where they can meet other men, often men in positions of leadership.





Also, as men get older, they naturally seek the friendship and companionship of other men, and there seems as if there would be plenty of opportunity to share wisdom, pass on hints for a happy life, etc.





Are you saying this doesn't happen? How very sad.





From *this* woman's point of view, I would suggest that men (and women) approach dating with three main guidelines ~ dignity, self respect and respect for others.





~ Behave towards others in the way you wish to be treated ~ with courtesy and respect, avoid those who treat you badly, and don't lower yourself to act in a bad or shabby way.





~ If things don't go to your liking on a date, exercise self restraint, say 'thanks a lot' and move on. Wallowing and desperate tactics are undignified and self defeating.





~ Don't allow yourself to be used or to be a user. People can be weak, out of control or simply stupid. If you join them, or take advantage of them, you lower your dignity, and compromise your self respect.





~ Act like you'll have to give an account of yourself tomorrow. You will, actually ~ to yourself.





~ If you have a high regard for your own worth, and treat other people as though your respect them as individuals, you will find no-one regards you as creepy or a loser.





~ True losers may mock you for having self worth and dignity. They do this from their own pain and the knowledge no-one thinks highly of them. It's not an enviable trait.





~ It may take the self respectful person more time to find someone to share your time with, but the person you do find will be someone of similar quality to yourself.





Basically, it comes down to knowing that everyone is an individual person, with feelings, problems and potential, and acting like you believe that and have respect for their place in the world.





Cheers :-)